There are moments in life when you have to stop asking, “Why do people keep treating me like this?” and start asking, “What is it about my presence that makes certain people uncomfortable?” Because sometimes, the problem isn’t that you think you’re better than everyone else. Believe it or not most times people assume you’re better than them. And there is a difference. You can walk into a room without looking down on anyone and still make insecure people uncomfortable simply because you carry something they don’t understand. I am here to tell you that you may have a rare anointing.
A presence that cannot be manufactured. A level of discernment that makes it difficult for people to manipulate you. A willingness to speak the truth when everyone else is afraid to say it. A heart that continues to love even after experiencing disappointment. A strength that was developed through everything you survived. And sometimes, people don’t know how to respond to someone who refuses to dim themselves just to make everyone else comfortable. This next part is not to glaze you up but…
Your Anointing Isn’t an Invitation to Be Mistreated
Let’s be clear. Having a rare gift, calling, purpose, personality, intelligence, creativity, or eve spiritual awareness does not make you better than another human being. Shoot for the longest I would not even talk about the things I can do because I felt it would land me a one way ticket to an insane asylum. And as my life went on I realized that even me being me can cause others to lie on me in an attempt to portray me as crazy by twisting the things I did or said. As time went on I also learned that having these abilities doesn’t mean you should pretend that everyone operates at the same level of awareness, accountability, maturity, or integrity.
Humility does not require self-abandonment. Being humble doesn’t mean making yourself smaller. Being loving doesn’t mean accepting disrespect. Being forgiving doesn’t mean repeatedly giving someone access to hurt you. And having compassion doesn’t mean ignoring someone’s character. There will come a point where you have to recognize: “I don’t think I’m better than you. But I am no longer willing to participate in behavior that is beneath the person I am becoming.” And that’s not arrogance that’s discernment!
Some People Will Misinterpret Your Confidence
When you know who you are, people who don’t know who they are may interpret your confidence as arrogance. When you establish boundaries, people who benefited from your lack of boundaries may call you difficult. This is a normal tactic used to make you second guess the actions (boundaries you established) to make you feel guilty. When you stop accepting disrespect, people who were comfortable disrespecting you may accuse you of changing.
When you start succeeding, people who are struggling with themselves may accuse you of thinking you’re better than them. And sometimes, your biggest mistake is trying to convince them otherwise. This is a mistake I made, I wasted so much time attempting to prove to people who made up their minds that I was the problem after listening to the person who was smearing my name. You don’t have to spend your entire life explaining your heart to people committed to misunderstanding you. The best thing to do is close that door and let your character speak. Let your consistency speak. Let your actions speak. And most importantly, let your peace speak. In time those same people will either contact you to attempt to apologize, spill the tea on those who lied to them, tell you of the falling out they had with your abuser etc.
Your Difference May Be the Very Thing You’re Supposed to Protect
Maybe you’ve spent years wondering why you never quite fit in. Have you always felt like you did not belong here on this planet since you were a child? Did you ever find yourself asking questions like why you notice things other people ignore? Why you question things everyone else accepts. Why you feel uncomfortable participating in conversations that tear other people down. Why you can’t pretend everything is okay when you know it isn’t. Or why you struggle to remain silent when someone is being mistreated.
Maybe you thought something was wrong with you. But what if your difference isn’t a defect? What if it’s part of your assignment? Your innate ability to see differently may be necessary for the people you’re meant to reach. Your voice is necessary. Your creativity is necessary. Your perspective is necessary. Your testimony is necessary. What if your story is the very thing that helps someone else survive theirs. I want you to know to not destroy your uniqueness trying to become acceptable to people who only appreciate you when you’re convenient. SO-
Stop Shrinking to Protect Other People’s Ego
There is a difference between humility and hiding. Some people have been taught to shrink themselves because their confidence makes other people uncomfortable. Them being themselves seems to upset or push people away… So they or maybe even you change to avoid being too successful, speaking too loudly, knowing too much, avoid challenging people, setting boundaries. Instead I challenge you to do exactly all those things. Learn to be different! Learn to shine too brightly, hurt those dark and gloomy MF eyes! Because at some point you will need to learn and will realize that you were not created to spend your entire life managing other people’s insecurities.
You are responsible for how you treat people. You are not responsible for how someone chooses to interpret your existence. You are only in charge of the energy you put out, not how people receive it! So if you’re walking in humility, treating people with respect, taking accountability when you’re wrong, and refusing to intentionally demean others, then you don’t have to apologize because your light makes someone uncomfortable.
But Check Yourself Too
This is where real self-awareness comes in. Don’t automatically assume every person who disagrees with you is jealous. Don’t label every critic a hater. Don’t call every boundary a spiritual battle. And don’t use the word “anointing” to avoid accountability. Sometimes people are uncomfortable because we’re growing. However, sometimes people are uncomfortable because we’re actually doing something wrong.
Discernment requires us to ask ourselves difficult questions. Am I being misunderstood—or am I refusing to understand? This will be a test of your ego. Am I being persecuted—or am I being held accountable? Am I protecting my peace—or avoiding necessary conversations? Am I walking in confidence—or am I developing an ego? Those questions don’t weaken your anointing. They strengthen your character. When someone repeats a pattern even after being informed about it multiple times. That shows a character flaw, that is not a mistake but a conscious choice with their ego to always be right.
The Right People Won’t Require You to Become Smaller
The people meant to be in your life won’t constantly compete with your light. They won’t need you to fail so they can feel successful. They won’t need you to be insecure so they can feel confident. They won’t demand that you silence yourself so they can remain comfortable. For the right people can celebrate your growth without making your growth about them. They are able to see you shine and say: “I’m happy for you.” Allowing you to look at them and say: “I’m happy for you too.” Without any worries of ulterior motives. That’s what a healthy connection looks like. Not having to worry about if those around you are low key jealous and if they will attempt to hurt or end you for a come up or clout. There is room for both people to win.
Your Assignment Is Not to Convince Everyone
Maybe the season you’re entering requires you to stop explaining yourself. Stop begging people to understand your intentions. Stop chasing people who repeatedly misrepresent you. Stop attempting- (we do not say try around here, we do) to prove that you’re a good person to people committed to believing you’re not. Stop shrinking because someone else doesn’t know how to handle your confidence. Lastly, stop confusing rejection with failure. The way that I view rejection is simply redirection. After all FAIL stands for
First
Attempt
In
Learning
Sometimes losing access to certain people is protection. Sometimes being misunderstood forces you to become comfortable with knowing yourself. And sometimes the greatest breakthrough happens when you finally say: “I know who I am, and I don’t need everyone to agree with me.” So once you understand that your rare qualities are not meant to make you superior. But they’re meant to make you useful. That your strength is meant to help someone. Your wisdom is meant to teach someone. Your story is meant to encourage someone. Your voice is meant to challenge something. Your love is meant to heal something. Your presence is meant to bring something into the world that would not exist without you.
Maybe than you would stop holding yourself back and not confuse being different with being better. But don’t confuse humility with becoming invisible either. You can walk in humility and still walk boldly. I recommend to love people and yet still have boundaries. Forgive people and still remove their access. Be compassionate and still tell the truth. Celebrate others without diminishing yourself. And recognize that you carry something rare without believing that makes you more valuable or treating yourself different than another human being.
Your anointing isn’t a crown to place above someone else’s head. It’s a responsibility to carry well. So keep growing. Keep healing. Keep learning. Keep becoming. And if your light makes certain people uncomfortable, don’t immediately assume you need to turn it off. Sometimes the answer isn’t to dim your light. Sometimes the answer is simply to stop standing in rooms where people are determined to make you feel guilty for shining.
Relax your mind, it’s all in Divine Time.
Keep growing. Keep healing. Keep protecting your peace.
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