Broken hearts and heartaches

I have collected a bunch of broken hearts during my hoe phase which used to transpire after a breakup. My cycle was I would get out of a relationship and be depressed and cheer myself up by having physical relations with women. Some of these women would catch feelings and want to be the only one even after informing them that we are just having fun. When they would not want to accept that I am not ready to be in a relationship and just fulfilling my selfish needs at the moment. Hearts would become heavy and as they continued to engage with me in hopes of changing my mind or being the one that I choose when I am ready to try again, they become angry to see that I decide to settle with someone that is not them. I am not proud of the organs that I have collected in jars over the years. Due to this I have learned a toxic behavior that I have. My partner has informed me that I used to “fold these girls like origami” I guess the fact that I wanted them to enjoy the experience as much if not more than me (I am a pleaser) that would get them hooked. So for all those whom I have hurt in the past. I am sorry.

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